What do you think about my story?

I was just writing a whole bunch of one page starts to stories, hoping i could find one to start building a plot on.

What are you opinions as far as skill and such. I'm only thirteen, so i hope to improve on my writing greatly over the years. Thanks for all the answers!

Tears brimmed Carren Millcrow's eyes as she beamed up from her morning paper toward her daughter. She was at the breakfast table with a half eaten plate of food setting on a place mat in front of her. She had her reading glasses perched on her narrow nose and a cup of steaming coffee in hand.

"I just can't believe your already grownup, it seems just yesterday I was changing your diapers and chasing you around the neighborhood." Ms. Millcrow had a small smile sweep across her face, obviously remembering precious memories.

Out-front a distant honk sounded. Of course, leave it up to Ali to be fuming with impatience. Katie began shuffling around the kitchen grabbing her books and jacket. She quickly slipped on her shoes and opened the door. She looked back and said, "Well, Mom, time goes on and so do our lives. I need to go; Ali is pissed since I am making us late."

"Oh yes," Ms. Millcrow softly said,” You wouldn’t want to be late for your big day. I hope you have fun, first days always seem to be a little confusing."

Katie made a quick wave of acknowledgement and raced out the door. She quickly jumped into the car, throwing her things in the back seat and giving a heavy sigh of relief. Ali, put the car in reverse and stomped on the gas, making the car swerve backward in a hurry. Katie was fumbling for the seat belt and clamping her hand on the edge of the seat, hoping not to fly out the windshield.

"You can take it easy," Katie almost shouted.

"Did your mom go crazy or were you having a terrible time doing your hair?" Ali spat back. "It's going to take the whole living day to find a parking spot now."

"It was mom again," Katie replied with a sudden sorrow.

"Katie, if she needs some help we can talk to the school counselor! You can't let her run your life...you got high school to worry about." Huffed Ali.

Katie new that Ali was right. Her mom just couldn’t stand the thought of her beautiful, wonderful Katie leaving her once she was finished with high school.

"Please Ali, let’s not talk about this." Begged Katie.

"Fine, fine." Ali replied back with her teeth clenched and a dangerous glare gleaming on her face. Ali was exiting the long dirt drive on to the highway. She sped to the school with her foot pressed on the gas, going over the speed limit by a drastic amount.



Once they had reached Newbridge High School their quarrel had been solved. Katie knew that there were atrocious issues taking place in her household and she sensed that Ali was coming to an accurate conclusion as to the events and episodes.

As Ali turned off the ignition, they both stepped out of the low setting car. The parking lot was crowded and full. Although it had a large surface area, Katie could feel nausea rolling in due to the all the students. Ali grasped on to her hand as they weaved through the lot. People were circled around cars, laughing and giving away hugs to good friends. They reached the front entrance and stopped. Ali rummaged through her purse and pulled out various pamphlets. She flipped through them and found a map of the sophomore building and campus.

"Here we go." Ali stated promptly as she square her shoulders and held her head high. She grabbed Katie's hand again and they pushed through the front glass doors.

They walked directly into the lobby and main office proportion of the building. The sophomore building was definitely bigger than the freshman building. Katie glanced around, seeing a fat lady sitting in the secretary desk. Soda and snack vending machines were lined up against the opposite wall. The lobby was decorated in a floral print, and was made up of several shades of pinks.

"May I help you two ladies?" Wheezed the secretary.

"Oh no, were fine. We are just trying exploring...Mrs. Quelton." Ali answered as she squinted at the polish name plate propped at the front corner of the secretary's desk.

They turned and walked toward a set of stairs. They made their way up and their shoes made a thud as they step up each stair.What do you think about my story?
Nwah thats nice...ur using my name!

No but thats a good story you got going on there!

Kaite :DWhat do you think about my story?
Well, I'm certainly interested...keep writing, friend! :)What do you think about my story?
You should put that on quizilla or wattpad.com :)